Misanthropia incarnate

Silence Is Deafening

Laughter and conversation swirling our heads
Small sentiments expressed in hushed whispers
Hopes exchanged in the midnight hour
Dreams entwined between two bodies merged as one

Tonight I hear nothing

The final sound echoed
Hope shattering, scattering across the floor
One humbled being and two hearts on the line
Only one walks away

I still hear nothing…

What once was now will never be again
There is no fairy tale to be had in these pages
Redemption never came to a humbled man
A humbled man lies broken in half

Silence still lingering

He will stand, he will walk forward again
and pick the shards of this new past from his flesh
He will find his voice in time and push forward in time
but the scar from that night will always remain…

…and still lingering…

The night the end silenced his breathing
Stopped his heart from beating
The night the music faded away to nothing
and left the cold resonance of nothing.

Forever now this silence is deafening.

-Brandon Daniel 

Means & Ends

The struggle of seeing the means justifying the end
is one I’m fighting with fists and rage.
Words I uttered to myself
a reminder of how far I would go
And now my arms are stretched far apart
Spread wide upon the rack
Stoic I remain as the stabs of swords and arrows
pierce flesh and draw my blood to the earth.
“Give me more” I scream
There is no punishment too severe
No wound I can’t endure
Leave me shaking, trembling, suffocating, bleeding
I will find a way to pull myself along and keep crawling
These are just mortal wounds to the ego
This is just a scarred heart
And sometimes you can’t just shrug it off
Sometimes there’s need to scream, to shed tears
To know you are still human
To know that you are still breathing
To know your heart is still beating
So I crack a smile
and let the red swirl over my tongue and flow from my lips
These wounds are something I can take
The pain will never be too great
I will never break
These means are only temporary
and the ends are far too great.

-Brandon Daniel

Chasing A Big Red Ball

Waving my hands above my head as proof that I’m drowning.
Emphatic screams to make you hear my voice.
Throwing rocks in your direction to make you turn your head
Trudging miles with bloody soles in hopes to share a seat…
but every desperate gesture goes unnoticed.
The cold shoulder is a stoic reminder
that the gate is locked for now.
A manifesto to lay the path for what is to come
For now all that is left is to pull myself out of knee deep waters
And walk sheepishly towards the shore
as I hang myself out to dry for a while
Absorb some substance from the air
and hope it gives me a high beyond today.

-Brandon Daniel

Absolution By Oblivion

Infinite

The word itself stretched out before me
Expanding beyond sight
Flowing immesurable distances beyond reach
Intangibles waiting for hands to give them form
Still my eyes remain closed
Stubborn nature preventing discovery
Finally the ground crumbles around me
The earth I believed solid once
now leaving me hovering in uncertainty

Floating in obscurity
Wandering without sight, navigating blindly
Understanding the abyss that surrounds me
has now become everything
The grip of emotion now released
No more desperation
Released of all frustration
This cleansing in oblivion leaves the final note
There is nothing left to lose

No longer confined by chains of the past
Absolution grants new vision
Sets my feet on new ground
Walking into the unknown
No trepidation stands in the way
Panic of the unknown slowly fades
and gives way to optimism
Infinite becomes another word
that no longer looks so big.

-Brandon Daniel

Phoenix Complex, pt. 2

Plumes of smoke once navigated blindly
give way to the taste of fresh air in my lungs.
The dull blinding blackness begins to fade
and now there is sight beyond this abyss.
Grasping aimlessly for something to hold onto
now walking towards the door to a new day.
Treading cautiously to avoid the plunge to the bottom
but from the bottom I stand on my feet again.
Incinerated and charred beyond recognition
now reincarnated from ash.
Dreamt only of the end for 28 years
only to see the beginning today.

-Brandon Daniel

Carapace

A mirror finally shattered…

Years spent cocooned in a facade of apathy and disdain
Created to make a mockery of the despised flaws and fractures in the world
A satirical reflection and cautionary tale of what never to become
All the while finding amusement in the performance
But this performance will consume you…

An innocent victim created, still so guilty
Guilty of giving into what we never want to become
The individual assimilates into the masses
He becomes the foul taste in his own mouth, the scowl upon ever face
This creation has swallowed purity whole

The shattering of the most fragile of hearts
Removing any ounce of bliss from the lives around him
The pretentious self aware picture of artistic torment
Reflecting the hypocrisy of humanity in himself
And every bridge built to him he burned

The animosity felt when staring down a reflection in a broken mirror
Amplified once he emerges from the shell
Taking in the extent of what desecration he has brought forth
Searching for familiar faces to lend a smile
Only to be greeted with the sting of a solitary existence

Immolation in the embers of all the bridges burned.
A final punishment.

-Brandon Daniel

Locked Down and Soundproof

These screams seem to be muffled
Choked to nothing by the walls of your newly built fortress
I beg and plead for you to throw me the key
To give me a window to see in
But I remain cast out for now
If I see the day to walk in your world again,
I’ll bring your walls crashing down again.

-Brandon Daniel 

Mosh. Rinse. Repeat.

The world once on mute
Cold and silent
Now resonating in the distance
A temporary distraction from intensive introspection
The approaching cresendo nearing
So close but still so far
But I can wait for the breakdown
to drop tomorrow.

-Brandon Daniel

Two Hits, Two Hearts, No Beats

Eagerly awaiting those swollen eyes to peel open,
I stare in awe at the portrait before me.
Beauty before and after the crash,
I stare paralyzed by the new perfection created from chaos.
Tenderly caressing her face, I let promises linger in the air
Her nurse I become.
The compliments and stroking of the wounded ego,
so necessary for her to walk on her own again
To step forward alone, I’ll be her crutch for now.
She takes IV drips of reassurance
Amphetamine kisses to revive the broken heart
She once again shines so bright.
But I’m her life support…
And she now resides within my veins
Impossible to ignore her strength
I keep her sedated
Chained to narcotic smiles,
she stays locked in a cold, complacent embrace.
We are dialed in to this apathy
This high is all we need.
My addiction is keeping you addicted to me
and I’m forever hooked on you…
Let this codependence choke us and turn our bodies blue
What junkie romance cliches we have become.

-Brandon Daniel